I Broke Up…with Facebook

affection board broken broken hearted
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Back at the end of 2018 I came to a rather abrupt decision, not just to leave Facebook, but to walk out and never go back.  Facebook and I are over, we broke up and I never want to see it again (*disclaimer*…at least for the forseeable future…).

So, on the 5th January, after leaving a message up on my Facebook for a week prior saying I was leaving and should anyone want to stay in contact to inbox me their mobile, and after downloading all the information that I wanted to save from my account, I hit the delete account button.  Facebook does, kindly, let you know that it puts your account into de-activation mode for a month incase you want to come back within that 30 day period…helpful, but no.

And this wasn’t a decision I had truly thought about and mulled over, I just decided that I was fed up of the social media platform, just like that, there was no decision to be made, I’d had enough and I wanted out there and then.  A few friends were pretty surprised as I’d spent half my degree years working on projects about social media and proclaimed my love for Facebook pretty much daily for the past few years.

And here I am now, just over a month into not having a Facebook…do I miss it?  Not particularly, though in the beginning I would pick up my phone and not really know why.  That habit was quite a worrying one as I had not really noticed how much I used to pick it up to check Facebook and it was a pretty hard one to break too.

So, why did I leave?  That’s what you have all been waiting for me to answer right?  Well, it was a mixture of things, one being the endless amount of hours I spent scrolling through my feed (and we are talking around 2 hrs a day) and not really getting anything out of it aside from frustration borne from seeing the same things posted over and over again, whether it be videos, memes or articles.  No longer was I connecting with friends, I had no idea what any of them were up to in real life as no one seems to share any snippets of their life anymore, and surely that is the one thing that Facebook is supposed to do, after all, their tag line is “Facebook helps you connect and share with the people in your life.”.  And when people did share something personal it always seemed to be a smug photo of them on holiday/at a fancy restaurant/showing off a new purchase/whatever and to me it sort of felt like people were gloating and bragging and, honestly, I really hate that (not to say I’ve never been guilty of that).

Facebook breeds meanness, I used to be in a lot of groups for one thing and another and, while people were encouraged to share things, like, for example, something they had made, the amount of mean comments that were posted underneath made me feel a bit insecure and not wanting to share.  I was always taught that if you have nothing nice to say then not to say anything and that is a transferable skill…it works on-line too.

Then there is the whole censoring what you say, not for any political reasons or anything else, but because half the people you work with are on your Facebook friends list and you don’t want them to know certain things, or that you can’t say something because it might upset someone else and it all just becomes a headache.

And don’t get me started on algorithms and that Facebook controls what you see from which friends…

I think what it all boils down to is that I just became really irritated with Facebook and it left me feeling not too good about myself, wasn’t giving me anything in return of any sort of value, it wasn’t enhancing or enriching my life and when that happens, whether it is a real relationship or a relationship with a social media platform I think its time to call it a day.

Since I have left Facebook I have been reading more blogs and articles online that I’m interested in, writing and working on my blog more, creating more and just enjoying time where I have noting to do for what it is – simple, quiet downtime.  And its been brilliant.

Will I ever return to Facebook?  At the moment I can’t see that happening any time soon, I’m still getting to grips with Twitter and I’m pretty happy with Instagram, but it’s not something I would rule out entirely.

36 thoughts on “I Broke Up…with Facebook

  1. I couldn’t agree more. I don’t get anything out of FB anymore – I miss seeing pictures of people and more than just the same five people. And those memes – sooooo tired of those too!

    1. As soon as Facebook bought in the opportunity to share outside links and pictures I think it started going down hill. It’s just turned into a share-fest of videos, web links and memes! Xxx

  2. I deleted my account on FB years ago. I don’t miss it, especially the mean and passive aggressive parts. So many people said they were my friend while I was there, yet those people are nowhere to be found in my FB-free life now. Interesting. 🤔

  3. I haven’t deleted facebook completely, but it’s basically just a backup for my Instagram pics at this point. I keep it just to keep the messenger because that’s how I stay in contact with some people. I don’t have the app on my phone (just the messenger) and I’m not signed in on my phone either. I deleted the app and I was still getting notifications! It was so annoying. I had to actually sign out of the website on my phone before it would leave me alone.

    1. It’s a pain isn’t it! I thought about keeping the messenger part of it but am not to keen on people being able to see when I was last active on there. I know you can see when someone was active on WhatsApp but that feels different as it’s close friends and family only! Xxx

  4. I never got started with Facebook as I felt I’d never have the time to maintain it all, and looking at the negative comments about it here and elsewhere, I am not tempted. Sounds like a semi-abusive relationship.

  5. I’m trying to disconnect from Facebook since last year. It’s hard when some of my family leave far away and they want to know how I’m doing. I have found that every time and check my Facebook my depression gets worse. Instead of checking my Facebook in daily basis, I just check three times a week. However, my goal by summer I want to be out of Facebook for good. I’m beginning to hated it.

  6. I too broke it off with Facebook. At the end of 2017 thru August of 2018 and then I jumped back on for a few and have completely decided once and for all it adds no value whatsoever to my life. I will not return. It is difficult though because it is a great platform to promote your blog and things for sale. I cannot do it though.

  7. I think you made the right choice, Suzi. I have never had a Facebook account, and never will. It is a brilliant exercise in control and manipulation of the users, and for many of them, an addiction similar in strength to Heroin. Well done for going ‘cold turkey’. 🙂
    Best wishes, Pete.

    1. Thanks! It’s weird but I’m still not missing it! And I’m so glad I did leave! I have so much more time now and didn’t realise how much of a time eater Facebook really was! Xxx

  8. I’m old enough for Facebook not to be my first language and it’s always seemed–well, kind of boring. I stay on it because I’m so far to the fringes that it doesn’t take much of my life. But yes, I see your point about leaving. It makes sense to me.

    1. Thanks! I too remember a time before Facebook and was one of the first of my friends to get it. At first it was really nice to see what people were up to and it made you feel connected in some way but, recently, and I feel this is since they introduced sharing of videos and articles, it seems that this is all that I saw on my feed, nothing really about what people were doing or anything but memes and stupid videos! Xx

    1. So glad it’s not just me! Seems that the more conversations I have about Facebook the more people are confessing that Facebook has lost its appeal! Xx

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